Embracing light and dark.  Recognizing Aversion.

This is me being vulnerable about my growth and learnings.  Have a read and feel free to share your own experience or share this post with those you feel called. 

When I first started my spiritual journey I was focused on raising my vibrational frequency, and as this progressed, my consciousness grew and I felt that my energy was ascending.  I have to admit I love this feeling, and I can stay here doing nothing for hours just floating away.  Although, there came a point where I noticed that this was impacting my ability to move forward and taking action and sharing my light in the way it is meant to be shared.

 I started recognizing and received clear messages from the universe, that there is a balancing piece to this ascension, that I need to honor, and embody to truly create heaven on earth.  The missing piece was to  embody the descent of energy.  The messy, yet powerful cleansing part, where we use the higher awareness we have gained to support us in the process of releasing destructive, self sabotaging behaviours, releasing limiting beliefs, letting go of fear based programming that we may have acquired through childhood and beyond.  Very quickly I learned that it was about shifting from my head to my heart and to my body.

The shift to this new perspective came with resistance from my inner self, that loved that floaty feeling and living in the ethers.  But the reality, as Yogi Bhajan always shared, we are householders, we are living, earning, having children, jobs and responsibilities.  Everytime, I was stuck in the ethers, (I now recognize and forgive myself) I was not truly being present to my physical, mental and emotional reality and not truly showing up for myself or my loved ones.  I was engaged in Spiritual Bypassing.

A few years later, I now enjoy the cleansing and purification process, I welcome it with curiosity and willingness.  In fact, the universe keeps giving me opportunities to further deepen  this cleansing process, be it through, Kundalini Yoga practices, Mindfulness and most recently, Psych-K.  I have learned and continue to learn to feel my feelings in my body, to welcome those unpleasant sensations and breathe into them with gentleness.  I have learned and continue to learn, to sit with emotions and thoughts that bring a great deal of discomfort and witness and acknowledge them.  I am liberating layers and layers of beliefs that keep me small - I am invisible, I am not enough, I am alone.  Every layer I access, every step I take, brings me closer to the true essence of my spirit.  I feel, liberated, weightless and grounded as I feel a greater sense of belonging and security.  I am building stamina, finding motivation to take committed action.  

As I consciously activate the ascent and descent of energy, my upper and lower chakras, my heart chakra has been activated in the most humbling ways.  I continue my inner work and I feel a yearning to share this gift and learnings that I have had with others.   

"The awakening of the upper chakras is needed to illumine the light of our soul that shines in our heart. The full functioning of the lower chakras is needed to create a foundation in our body to embody our heart light."

Guru Rattana